Turns Out, I'm Not That Smart

You know, my perspective on a lot of things has changed over the last year. I have a whole new appreciation for so many things I always took for granted before. One thing I've really found myself pondering on lately is how easy other people make things look.

Other people make being full time students look easy.

It's not. Sean is doing a lot of homework these days, and by a lot I mean an hour or so a week, which for him is a lot. Trust me, it is. I know it will get more difficult and time consuming as he advances the ranks of education, but for now it's a weird transition to see him home at 2:00 in the afternoon.

Other people make running a business look easy.

It's not. I've been learning QuickBooks, of which I'm not really a fan. I like the idea of QB, but it's really quite cumbersome. And by cumbersome, I mean it doesn't translate information directly from my brain to a neat, user-friendly spreadsheet, with nary a keystroke. See? Cumbersome.

Other people make being smart look easy.

It's not. I've always thought I'm pretty smart. I know a lot of crap. Useless, brain space hogging, annoying to most people kind of crap. I do a lot of stuff. Mostly half-assed, but stuff nonetheless. I can write a coherent sentence, do basic math, carry on a decent conversation, and even make people laugh. Although maybe that's not smarts. Hmm.

I think as my perspective on life has changed, my perspective on myself is changing. I guess that would seem a natural conversion. But as I go on about this little life of mine, I'm realizing I still have so much to learn. It's a little frustrating, but if I can keep a good attitude it makes it a little easier. I just need to keep myself from sabotaging myself. Be more optimistic instead of a pessimist so much of the time. Understand that things come gradually, not all at once. I hope I can be smart enough to wait it out.

Edumacation

Yesterday I attended a cutting class. I know, normally I was the one cutting class, and now I'm deliberately attending a class on cutting.

It's sad to say that over the years of doing hair, I've picked up some bad habits. Some out of shear (ha ha!) laziness, some out of necessity, but bad nonetheless. I tend to have a limp wrist when I cut. I tend to hunch my shoulders. I tend to crane my neck. All bad things. But as the years have worn on, they have become natural to me, and therefore they seem normal.

I was smacked with a terrible reality yesterday. As I stood in line to make sections and cuts on our Mannequins head, my wrist started hurting terribly. When I mentioned this to the instructor, she said I have been doing things wrong for so long, my ergonomics were all screwed up. Makes sense. Luckily it wasn't anything lasting, so I can go back to my lazy limp wristedness today, and things will feel much better.

But I also learned something else at my cutting class yesterday. I have been out of the loop for so long, I forgot how important education is. It's amazing what a little shift in texture here, or a snip at a different angle there will change in the look of a cut. I needed a little refresher course, and I got one. It was fun to see stylists from all ages and experience levels learning new things together. I never thought a beauty school student would ever teach me anything, but some of them really have a lot on the ball, and really know what's up in the hair doin' world.

So now I'm all edumacated. I feel smarter, and I think what I've learned will serve me well. At least until next season.

Learn Somethin'

Yesterday I met up with a friend and went to our old elementary school to let the kids play on the playground. It was weird being back there, everything was pretty much the same as it was when I was in 5th grade. Same gravel playground, same swings, same basketball hoops, same everything.

But I am definitely different.

I remember as a kid, swinging so high on those swings, showing off for my crush of the week, Shane, and thinking life was so easy. I knew I had it good as a kid. My parents worked hard, and we did lots of fun things as a family. I always knew I was blessed. Lucky even.

Yesterday as I shuffled through that gravely playground, I realized how different my life has turned out thus far from how I thought it would. I honestly never thought I would have 3 children. I never thought I would be a stay at home mom, and I certainly never thought I would be 30 something living with the in laws.

I always thought I would become a famous writer, live in a big city in a high rise apartment, and live alone. Really, that's what I wanted for myself. Boy, things sure are different now.

I guess life hands you lessons and you learn what you need, and then you move on to the next lesson. Apparently I'm a tough case because I need to keep relearning the same lessons. When will I learn to do what I'm supposed to do? How hard is my head that I need to keep working on the same lessons repeatedly? I guess going back to elementary school really put my life lessons in perspective. I will learn this time, I promise.

Home/Scool

Before you go thinking I'm going to homeschool my kids, let me just say I am using that title as a clever play on words. This post is about food.

Lunch, mainly.

I'm curious about how other people do home/school lunches with their kids.

Right now we give Emma $22.50 a month for lunch. That's for 10 lunches. She can use them as she sees fit, using up all 10, or carrying some over for next month. She usually comes out about even. But I have to say, I'm not looking forward to next year, and doing $45 a month for lunches! Yikes!

When she has home lunch, it's a sandwich, a juice box or Capri Sun, and a granola bar or a baggie of chips. Sometimes I'll throw a cookie or two in just for a surprise. I know, it's not super balanced, but it's what works, and it's what I have on hand.

What do you guys do? What do your kids like?

Change of Plans

Well, unfortunately the camp out was canceled on Friday night due to extremely bad weather. Like as in Tornado-bad weather. That is one thing I will never get used to out here, is watching the skies during a storm and praying we don't hear the tornado sirens.

It was supposed to be the father's and sons camp out on Friday night, and then the girls and I were going to meet up with Sugar Daddy and some friends for Saturday night. Since it was canceled Friday night, and I had a lot to do on Saturday, we just canceled the whole weekend altogether.



Part of it has to do with poor little G. Saturday morning she starting throwing up again. This is how she spent most of the afternoon on Saturday. I had a baptism to attend, and when I returned home she was still pretty sick. I was worried about dehydration, but by that evening she was drinking a little bit at a time, and not throwing it up, so I could tell she was on the mend.

Yesterday she stayed home with Daddy while I took the girls to church. It was so nice to be able to sit through Sacrament meeting without a kid climbing all over me! Those of you that know me at all might be surprised that I went to church even though I had a perfect excuse to stay home. I was surprised as well! I had just been feeling a sense of importance that I attend church yesterday. So I went, and first thing in Sacrament they change our first and second counselors in the bishopric, our Elders Quorum President, and the Ward clerk. Our good friends are now the holders of responsible positions! Obviously it hasn't rubbed off.

So I thought that was why I had been impressed to go to church. I went through the rest of the meeting just half paying attention. But during Sunday School, our lesson was on Temples. I was reminded of how important the temple is in our lives. Maybe that was why I needed to go that day!

Then in Relief Society we learned about Spiritual Gifts. Oh boy. This was definitely why I needed to go yesterday! It was really just what I needed to hear. I have been so angry about why other people can be healed and saved by their faith, when my mom and her obedient spirit were not. I have never had doubts about this before, because I have been on the positive end of healing so many times. But to see that the Lord has a plan for us, and despite our faith, if it is our time to go and work on the other side, it will be done. Knowing she serves a higher purpose on the other side of the veil brings me some comfort, but I'm sure this isn't the only time I will feel betrayed. Definitely something I'll be working through for a while.

I guess there is more than one way to deal with a change of plans.

Mom's Day Recap

I have to admit, I was dreading Mother's Day. I had these horrible feelings conjured up, and I was certain they would take over and drown me in sorrow.

I was wrong.

I had a great day. A little sadness, of course, but nothing like I had anticipated. Luckily, part of the reason for that is living outside of Utah, the Mother's Day church service wasn't a sappy song and dance meant just to make mom's cry. It was just any other Sunday. Youth speaker, check. Primary kids singing "Mother I Love You", check. Stake Young Womens President speaking on Relief Society, check.

Even Relief Society itself held a lesson not related to Mother's Day. "Facing Persecution with Fatih". Totally unrelated, see?

I was glad. I needed a break from the sorrow I had dreaded so much. I did leave during Sacrament meeting because I got something in my eye, (really! I did!) and as I was coming back out of the restroom, I was greeted by good friends making sure I was okay. Of course, it looked like I had been crying due to the watering eye situation, but I was fine. What good friends I have. Thanks, girls.

I was also treated to a mani/pedi/eyebrow wax for my day, and took the older girls along with me, as well. We had a great time, and their nails look beautiful! I bought myself a new pair of shoes, and 2 bouquet's of flowers, and called it good.

We had a bbq with some friends yesterday, and as always, we talked too much, stayed too late, and had too much fun. But that is what friends are for, I suppose.

So I survived my first motherless mother's day. I'm sure there will be more sad times to come, but I can do it. Also, thanks for the cards and letters. I have such an awesome support system, I know I can get through anything!

Driveolution

Yesterday I drove all the way to the airport, picked up my cargo, dropped them off at an undisclosed location to which I'd never been, and drove home using roads on which I'd never driven. I did all of this without using my GPS.

It was a good day.

Also, notice there are no dangling participles in that first paragraph. You're welcome.

Mamma, Mia

My mom, she was the bomb. I still hate saying "was", by the way. But she really was. I guess a couple of weeks ago, a family friend, Perry Montoya (doesn't that totally make you want to say "my name is Perry Montoya, you killed my father, prepare to die"?) That was a lot of punctuation right there at the end, wasn't it? I hope it was correct. Anyway, he called and said for Bingham High School's 100th anniversary, they wanted to put up a display of my mom's old Minerette clothes. Minerettes are the drill team for those of you uninitiated in the BHS-speak. She was Minerette president her senior year. She was very proud of that.

So the display is up, in all it's glory, in the Alumni room. If you're in the vicinity, swing on by and take a looky look. Also, be sure and check out Troy's mullet in the class of '89 SBO picture. He's a total ladies man, right Larissa? I think Jill has a pretty good legacy there as a cheerleader and a songleader, although I'm still not positive as to what the difference was. I, on the other hand, left a legacy of, well, zilch. Not a fan of the high school days. I was a gymnast and a diver, but then I figured out that a cool car and big boobs made life much easier than being athletic. Totally missed the whole "prepare for your future now" lesson in Humanities. Oops. Then there's Meg, the traitor. The first of the Brown family legacy not to graduate from BHS. But she paved her own road, and for all the right reasons. She still does that same thing today when it comes to life, so good for her. We love her anyway. So there you have it. Just because I know you were dying to know my family and our High School legacies. You're welcome.