Just When Things Are Running Smoothly

So as you can see on my side bar over there <----, I have successfully logged some miles for this month. Yay for me.

Boo for injuries resulting from said mileage.

It would seem that despite my best efforts at being a trooper and buckling down and getting my happy ass out the door to run and complete my goal, I have suffered a strain to my Peroneal Tendons.

I need to reiterate, this has no affiliation whatsoever with the Perineal anything. Totally different part of the body.

But this stinking injury has really put me in a mood. Now I can hardly walk, let alone run, and I just know I'll miss my goal for this month. The first month in, and I'll fail. What a way to start off the year. Bummer.

But I also know that unless I take it easy and let this thing heal appropriately, I'll be battling it all year, and that would be worse.

So I'm giving myself a pass on this one. I'm gonna bow out of January gracefully, and let myself pick up when I've healed fully. I know, I know, it seems like I'm just one of those people that sets goals and then doesn't follow through. I totally am, by the way, but not this time. I'll take whatever mileage I'm lacking at the end of January, and divide it into the remaining months, so when the year is all said and done, I will still have completed the initial amount of miles.

Win win. Good and good.

Because I'm Totally Failing

As you may notice, I have accumulated exactly 0 miles toward my goal of running 26.2 miles this month. I'm a winner. First month in and I'm already failing.

I have lots of good excuses, though. This reminds me of an ancient Chinese proverb that Sean reminds me of repeatedly.

"Excuses are like butt holes. Everyone has one, and they all stink."

Ahh, poetry.


In an attempt to quell the voices of failure that are rampant in my head right now, I am actually doing something good for my body. I am currently, as we speak, presently, eating a cup of fruit.

Eating would be a word I'm using loosely, because mostly I'm gagging it down one piece at a time.

I searched out a specific kind of fruit cup, the ones that are being advertised as being packed in 100% juice, because I thought they would be easier to eat than the ones packed in ooey gooey syrupy ick.

Turns out, the juice packed ones aren't making it that much easier on my fruit-phobic palate.

But it is thwarting the failure feeling inside me by distracting the voices from saying "nee nee nee nee nee, we knew you couldn't do it!" to a glom of confusion with this new healthy snack.

Just when I think the voices have triumphed, they are the ones that are failing! Take that, voices! Ha!

Angry Beavers

Obviously blogging wasn't one of my new years resolutions. I figure that takes away a feeling of failure for the time when my blogging is sparse.

Like now.

I really feel like I have nothing to post about. My days are busy, but not in the way others would percieve as fun or exciting. I wake up, get Emma off to school, watch a little news or New Adventures Of Old Christine (of which I've seen every episode, but still love), get dressed, do school with Mags, make lunch, go to work, come home, eat dinner, go to bed.

See, super exciting.

One new development is my anger issues. I don't know if it's the weather or what, but lately the littlest thing sets me off. I've always had a little anger problem, but my happy pills usually keep it at bay for the most part. Maybe it's because I'm working a lot and not running (yucky inversion!) that's making me angry. Maybe I just need to have a good attitude adjustment. Maybe it's my delayed reaction to things that happen in my life.

Whatever it is though, I've got to work on it. I've tried harder the last couple of days to be more patient with my kids and let the little things slide by. I've made an effort to pay attention to my thoughts when I start getting that angry feeling to see what the heck I can do to calm the crazy voices in my head.

*Just so we're clear, I'm not really hearing voices. No I'm not. No, I'm not, I swear.

So if you see me at the grocery store or the library and I have a larger than normal scowl on my face, just disregard it, and pretend you don't see me. Trust me, you're probably better off that way.

And lets pray for an early Spring, mmkay?

From Whence I Came

So my Emma, being an old soul like she is, has suddenly taken to the idea of finding out more about her ancestry. I, being basically repelled by the idea of genealogy, tried my darndest to keep putting her off. She asked if we could go to the family history library that just opened up near our house. Lucky for me it was closed during Christmas break. Then she asked again last night. I was pretty sure it closed at 5, but I looked it up for her anyway.

To her delight, and my chagrin, it was open until 9.

So we loaded her up in the car, Maggie tagging along, and she brought her papers with some family names from Grandma's side of the family.

We walked in, and it felt so, like, well, a library. It wasn't like I thought it would be. I had envisioned a musty dimly lit room with decrepit old men hunched over old dusty books with their beards dangling into the words, with their canes and walkers perched nearby. There were no old men like that, just so you know.

We had a super nice Sister Missionary come and help us get started, and she told Emma she began having an interest in her family history at about Emma's age. We searched and found quite a bit of information, which I won't bore you with here. Emma was starstruck. She wants to go back tonight. I think we need more info before we go again, but she doesn't care. She just wants to keep searching and searching.

I find it completely astonishing that a girl as young as Emma could have such a vision to want to know her ancestors. I always knew about mine on both sides, but after doing so much searching, I realized she doesn't really know her great grandparents on Grandmas side. Knowing how special Grandpa Hashbarger was, I find a renewed importance to let Emma understand that she comes from an amazing past.

I always knew my kids would challenge me, but I never realized they would teach me more than I could teach them.

I Resolve

Well, it's that time of year again. The time when we all make promises to ourselves that we're certain we won't keep, thus leading to immense feelings of guilt and failure. Sort of like the reason I don't send out Christmas cards, remember?

There was a time, a long time ago it seems, that I made a resolution for the new year, and it actually worked. I resolved to read each Ensign from start to finish for the entire year. I did it. I really did. I gained a new perspective on things, and it made me feel like a better person.

Then there was last year. Last year when all my hopes and dreams and aspirations basically seemed to go to Hell amidst one of life's largest upheavals. Not a good year for resolutions.

So this year I'm back on track. Literally.

I resolve to run 26.2 miles each month for 2011. I've done it once before, so I know I can do it. But I've had a few setbacks, what with the appendix out and the rib dislocation. I know to all you hard core runners that seems like a cake walk, and it really works out to be less than a mile a day. The theory I'm sticking with is aim low, then I can achieve and feel good about reaching my goal. Then maybe next time I'll aim a little higher and know I can do better. It's like a sort of stair step thing, see how that works?

So there, I've resolved to all the internets and all my readers, so I must be held accountable. I will (try to) put a mileage counter on my blog and update it as I go, which I think will be pretty cool, especially as the year winds down and I can look back at all the mileage I've completed. Hopefully I'll learn something through all this, and possibly lose a pound or two along the way.

Twas Merry, As They Say

Christmas came. It was fun. Now it's over. Enjoy these grainy cell phone pics, because I totally forgot to charge my camera the night before. Yep, again, mother of the year right here.

All the girls showing off their matchy matchy jammies they get from Mrs. Claus on Christmas Eve.


Gretta opened her first gift, promptly took the wrapping paper to the garbage, and sat down waiting for permission to open the rest of the gifts. It didn't take her long to get the hang of just ripping into them after that, though.


Maggie enjoying the the Easy Bake Oven she received. Oh joy. Plasticy tasting mini cookies and cakes that take teeny tiny parts to use.


Emma in the throes of gift unwrapping. She got a sewing machine, and she is actually pretty good at it!

So that was Christmas. I'm glad it's over. Now it's time to get the house in order and get on with things.

Merry Christmas Letter

Hello friends and family,

Instead of sending out Christmas cards this year, I've decided to write a letter detailing every minute detail of our mundane lives. That sounds like so much fun, right? Right. Here we go.

Beginning in January, we found ourselves back home in the Motherland, also known as Utah. Sean was beginning school at LDS Business College, and the girls were going to school with Grandma at Eastlake Elementary. We were living with Sean's parents, and plugging along with our new lives.

February met us with crazy cold and snow, unlike anything I've seen in Utah, and a lot more like what I was used to in Illinois. I got a little homesick for my life there, but I was also very glad to be back with family. School continued, and life was good. I also found out I was going to be an aunt again with Jill expecting her 5th baby! I was thrilled!

March was a welcome month, bringing the prospect of Spring, and warmer weather. Sean was wrapping up school, and hoping for a 4.0. The girls were off track, and thought that was pretty neat to have a long vacation from school.

April brought more changes, still. Sean was home from school, having just missed his 4.0 by this much. We moved into my Dad's old house, and I pulled Maggie out of school to begin homeschooling her. I also started a business doing hair again, and things were trying to get off the ground.

May was a great month to enjoy Spring weather. Emma was looking forward to Summer since Maggie was already enjoying some serious time off, and Gretta was enjoying having a friend around to play with. I was working here and there, and it was nice to be back behind the chair. We enjoyed a long weekend vacation with Meg and Josh to Lake Mead, which was a lot of fun. I could literally feel the winter melting off me while we were there.

June was the official beginning of Summer, and we started it off by getting annual passes to Lagoon. We had originally intended to buy passes to Six Flags again, but good thing we procrastinated, because those would have done us no good here in Utah. Lagoon was a great distraction for us throughout the summer, since Sean was going a little stir crazy being at home and not working or going to school, and I was only working a couple of days a week.

July was spent enjoying family and friends. Sean's brother and his family returned to Utah after living in Brazil for 2 years, and we loved having their kids around. My sister came up from Vegas and stayed with us several times, and we always love having her. We also found out that Meg was expecting, and I was thrilled to have a new niece or nephew coming to our family.

August was hot and long. My birthday came and went, and now I'm another year older, yet no wiser. Sean was looking forward to school beginning again, and I was working hard. I also ran 26 miles that month, and I was loving the running life.

September brought our summer adventures to a close. We certainly made the most of it, though. I think we counted at least 20 visits to Lagoon. Those passes were worth every penny. The kids really got brave there toward the end of the season, going on upside-downy rides, and learning to wait in line without mom or dad there to help them. We were all nice and tan from our times at Lagoon-A-Beach, and tired from a lot of walking. I also became an Aunt again; Jill had her baby girl, named Elsie, and she is fat and yummy and it takes all my self control to not eat her.

October was a fun month for all of us. Sean was back in school and working hard, and I was working very hard, and thinking of making a change in my work situation. I was ready to grow the business more, and I needed more room. By the end of the month, I was officially moving into a new building, and renting a space all my own. I was thrilled. Unfortunately, during the month, I also had to have my appendix out, which really threw me for a loop. Trying to move things while recovering from surgery can be tricky. Luckily, I recovered just fine, and the move to the new place went off without a hitch.

November brought thoughts of Thanksgiving and other family adventures. One good thing we had happen was my Dad and Noma getting sealed in the temple. We were all there, and it was nice to see them so happy. We spent Thanksgiving weekend with Jill in Vegas, and it was a nice new tradition. We did major Black Friday shopping, and even though it was colder than normal, it was still warmer than Utah! Emma was in 6th grade and loving it, and Sean was in the throes of schoolwork, wrapping up the finishing touches for his business transfer degree. Maggie and I were doing homeschool, and she was thriving, just like I knew she would.

December brought the one year anniversary of Sean getting laid off, his 35th birthday, Christmas, and our anniversary. A busy month for sure. We didn't celebrate his lay-off day, of course, but we did celebrate his birthday with a nice dinner out, and a stay at Little America for the night. This is also known as our North Pole trip, since we wrap up our Christmas shopping at the same time. Sean finished up school, and although he could be done at LDSBC, he has chosen to stay one more semester to gain his accounting degree, rather than a transfer degree. I think he will fare better in the future with 2 solid degrees beneath him. Christmas is upon us, and I'm looking forward to being here this year to celebrate with our families. On December 3oth, we'll celebrate our 13th wedding anniversary. My how time has flown!

I hope you aren't too terribly bored, I tried to keep it to the bare minimum. And let's face it, my life just isn't that exciting. I hope you all have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!