Friday, November 4, 2005

One second he's fine, the next, not so much.

So here I am, taking care of one of my favorite patients. He comes in for Chemo a lot, so we all know him. Well, here he sits, talking and joking, and suddenly, out of nowhere, he's turning blue and gasping for breath. I'm the only one around, and I'm so not feeling qualified at this moment, so what do I do? First, I poop my pants, then I scream. Yes, I did. I full on screamed. I know, not the most professional thing to do, but boy was I taken off guard. This was the first time I'd actually had one of my patients do that so quickly. It seems like the ones you think are going to be the ones to do it never are, and here is Mr. "Hi, I'm just here to get my Chemo and get my fever down, no big deal, and you all love me because I'm so funny and cute" that takes a tumble toward the light. Weird. Well, needless to say, I got a new pair of scrubs out of it (see incident prior to the screaming), and he did finally come around. Good thing I only had to work a few hours last night, I don't think I would have lasted after that. So now I've realized I'm grossly unqualified and inexperienced, despite my schooling. I guess there are things that only experience can teach. Darn that. I mean, don't get me wrong, I love my job, but sometimes it makes you realize that life is so short. One second you're here and talking, and the next you're following the dark tunnel to the bright light. **** "It's so beautiful,....I can't help it". So that was my day. Or night. Whatever.


**** Gnat flying into the bug zapper in "A Bug's Life"

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