This morning I awoke to two things.
1. I had a nose bleed. Some people have cowlicks or widows' peaks that run in their families, but we have nose bleeds. Aren't we lucky? Yes, we are. So at 4:30 AM, I wake up to that icky taste in my mouth. I hate that. So half-coherent, I'm staggering to the bathroom to take care of this mess. And even luckier, it wouldn't stop. So for a half an hour I sat on the edge of the bath tub and half slept, half gagged.
2. Finally, it stopped. 5:15, I just drift off to sleep, and find myself startled awake by the sound of my dog whining. She never whines. Unless... Yep, she pees on the carpet. The newly cleaned carpets, mind you. Now my mouth tastes like blood and toilet paper, and my house smells like dog pee. Great morning.
But I got to go to lunch with Sugar Daddy, and brave Wal-Mart for a few last minute gifts, so my day improved drastically. I certainly don't think it could have gotten worse.