FFF

Here is the after shot of the triple molectomy.

I look kind of pissed off, I know, but I'm not, really. I just got back from work, and there was a small waxing incident and I was all sweaty and gross when I took this picture, so that should explain a lot.

I'll post more about the waxing later.



See? No chin mole! Yay! And the ones next to my nose and eye are gone, as well, but I haven't had time to properly pick the scabs off yet. Don't worry, I will.

And FYI, this is a totally unretouched photo. Can't even remember the last time I did that. Eeeks.


Happy Friday!

Movie Review

Today we saw DisneyNature's Oceans. I'm giving it 2 stars out of 5. Not great, I know, but I have my reasons, and they have little to do with the actual movie.

First off, I ran yesterday. I know, I'm so proud of myself. But turns out, us fat chicks, we get winded when we run, and after I got home, I couldn't catch my breath. So I popped a Singulair. Then my nose wouldn't quit, so I popped a Zyrtec. This was at about 6:00 PM.

By 3:00 AM this morning, I was so agitated I wanted to rip my skin off. My legs were so restless, my head was going in 20 different directions, and I couldn't calm myself down. I ended up watching Awakenings, ironic, I know, until I dozed back off on the couch at 6.

Enter movie time this afternoon. Still agitated, bitchy and down right miserable. I thought getting out and getting my mind off the jitters would do me some good. Well, about half way through the movie I couldn't take it anymore, so I had to get up and move. I ended up pacing back and forth for the last half of the movie.

Really, it was a great show. The pictures are amazing. The story, not great. It's a little disconnected since they don't follow any sort of pattern with the animals (i.e. focusing on one particular region for a while, then segueing to another, or even sticking with one particular type of sea animal, the food chain, cycle of life, etc.) Plus, it was narrated by Pierce Brosnan, and I was sort of hoping he would break into song, a la Mamma Mia. He didn't.

It was a nice treat for the kids, and I like the fact that they learned something from it. Afterward, they were all talking at once about their respective favorite parts, and that makes the homeschooling mama in me very proud.

So if you need an out in the next couple of crappy weather days, take your kids to see this movie. Just sneak in some candy and save yourself a few bucks. Come on, you know you all do it!

Cool Water

Sunday I was still convalescing from the triple molectomy, so instead of churching it, we decided to take a drive. I wasn't really up to showing off my 10 stitches and all the scabbing that has since ensued, so I thought staying under cover and out of sight was probably a good idea.

We arrived at Tibble Fork Reservoir, and it was actually full! I haven't seen it full for years, so it was a nice surprise. The weather was awesome, warm and breezy, and the kids (Sean) had a blast throwing rocks (boulders) into the water.

We decided that since Monday was supposed to be nice, too, we might as well get our $6 worth of the 3 day entrance fee and head back with the kayak and some snacks and make a day of it.

Kids on our Sunday drive.

Monday we left at 10ish and picked up Troy and Kelli's kids. We all headed up the canyon with swimsuits and towels (completely unnecessary since the water was freezing), snacks, drinks, chairs, lunch, and of course the kayak. Not surprisingly Madison and Emma were the first ones to head out on the boat. They paddled to the opposite shore and back, and then the other kids all took turns.

Emma and Madison

Madison and Gabe

We hung around for a few hours, then came back home to lawn mowing and sandbox playing. The kids finally donned their suits, fired up the hose, and proceeded to make a mud pit out of the sand box. It was just like old times.

I love that my kids get along with their cousins so well. They play so well together, there is nary a sideways glance. They are all good kids, and all love to play outside, inside, sideways, doesn't really matter as long as they get to play together.

Fun For Friday

Today I go under the knife. A triple molectomy. Not really sure how this is going to play out since the last time I had a molectomy half my face was numb for most of the day.

Here's some close ups that I know you're dying to see.

Mole numero uno. Next to my eye. I'm sure taking this one off will make my eye look all droopy like I've had a stroke. That should be fun.



Mole numero dos. This picture isn't great, not that any of them are, but I'm sure getting this one whacked will make me feel like I can't breathe since it's right by my nose. That, coupled with my droopy stroke eye will be an interesting combination.



And finally, the winner, the reason this whole molectomy journey even began. Mole numero tres. This bad boy has been with me my whole life, but in the last few years has gone from a little cute beauty mark, to an angry raised bump that makes me look mean. It bleeds and scabs and it's just really gross. So take this, along with numeros uno y dos, and my whole face will be numbed and wacky. I'm sure this one will make my lip look droopy, so there may be some drool associated with it's removal.

Good times ahead. I'll be sure to post after pics, don't worry.

Happy Friday!

I'm totally blogging from an iPad at the Apple store! That is all.

Home Improvements

Today I have pictures! Yay for crappy cell phone pictures! But hey, it's better than nothing, right?

We have issues in this house. I love being back "home", but there are things that I grew up with that never bothered me, until now, being back as an adult.

Two major things are the bathrooms. Oh boy, did they need some help. The first thing that had to go was the curtains. I use the term loosely as you'll soon see.




See? Redneck curtains. Now, I can't even imagine how long those towels have been there, but I'm guessing somewhere in the ballpark of 10 years. Now that's getting your $3.99 worth out of a towel, right?

So my new adulthood eyes thought those should come down and be replaced by something cuter, if not more functional. So we made these.


Isn't that better? Material Girls in South Jordan has the cutest fabric, and totally worth the prices. Note that the sill still needs to be installed, but that's been missing for oh, 6 years, so I'm not betting on that happening any time soon, and I'm fine with that.



Here's the guest bath before. The tile is green and white, the walls are purple and the towel is yellow-ish. It's a lovely place to relax. Not. So as much as I (and everyone else) was sad to see Yellow Towel go, it had to be replaced.



Here is it's replacement in all it's glory. It's a cute light purple to match the walls, and I'll make a contrasting green and purple valance and trim to go with it to tie all the pretty colors together.

I have to give a huge shout out to Sean for doing these. He's the math guy at our house, and since there's a lot of math involved with adding the rings to the back in decreasing spacing increments, I left that up to him. Plus, there was drilling. I can use a drill, but it still scares me, I'll be honest.

So there you have it. Improvements.

Stay tuned for a special edition of FFF tomorrow, starring yours truly. I'm really putting it all out there for you, so you don't want to miss it!

I Have A Dream

You all know how I love the Duggars, right? Well, I do. They're funny and weird, and totally confident in who they are, all things I can appreciate.

The other night, well, morning, I guess, I had a dream about Jim Bob Duggar. We were spooning in his bed. He was dressed in khakis and a polo T-shirt and I was feeding him an ice cream drumstick. The pieces of chocolate kept falling onto his shirt (because eating ice cream while lying down is tough, trust me), and I would pick them up and feed them to him. At about this point in the dream I realize Michelle Duggar, bless her repetitively pregnant heart, was also in bed with us, dressed in a denim skirt and pink blouse.

I was a little jealous.

And then I woke up, and instantly realized I probably watch too much Duggar TV.

I know other peoples dreams just aren't that interesting, and this one is no exception. Not that this blog is ever that interesting, but this is probably an all time low.

But seriously? Jim Bob? Why couldn't it have been Matthew McConahey and Pink. I totally would have shared my ice cream with them.

It Is Done

Well, I did it. Yesterday I dropped the official home schooling affidavit in the mail. It was signed, notarized, and included a SASE for the district to send me back a signed copy.

I have to admit, I was nervous.

I mean this is a huge undertaking. What if I screw it up and my kid ends up a complete idiot unable to read or write, and it's all my fault? Yeah, I'm a freak.

I feel confident in a weird way, though, because I've read every home school book offered in the 2 libraries that are close to me. I've also scoured 3 Barnes and Noble's and pored over every book I can find on the subject.

I don't think I even did this much research when I was pregnant. Ever. Combined with all 3 pregnancies. What does that say about me?

So starting on Wednesday, Maggie will officially begin home schooling. She'll have a bit of a "deschooling" period where she'll just want to play and have fun and not really do anything "schooly", and that's completely normal and okay. Will you please remind me that I said that when weeks have gone by and I don't think I've taught her one thing?

I just can't believe it's done, and we're on to this new chapter. I'm thinking I'll start a home school blog to chronicle our daily life, so when/if I do, I'll let you know. I know, you're on the edge of your seats.

Monday Monday

Each day, while taking my kids to school, I see a plethora of exercisers and the like out and about. I imagine they have all been out running miles and miles before I ever see them, but since I'm in a neighborhood, I'm sure they've probably just started.

But this gets me thinking that I need to get back out there. I just need more support. The kind of support I need was told as a story on Radio From Hell this morning. I'll recap for you.

Richie was out for a training run for the Vancouver Marathon that is in a few weeks. He had just started when he came upon an intersection of roads that was closed. His first thought was that perhaps there had been an accident of some kind, until he saw a runner go by. He then realized the road was closed for the SLC Marathon.

So what did he do? He joined in. He ran along side the competitors, drank their Powerade and soaked up the encouraging claps and whistles as he ran the final 13 miles of the marathon route. And at the end, he just ducked out a few yards from the finish, called his girlfriend to come and pick him up, and had a beer at home.

Now that is my kind of support. Road closed, free Powerade at various intervals, and crowds of cheering spectators, all for a little run.

Anyone up for a run tonight?

Have You Missed Me? I've Missed You

Where have I been the last week and a half, you ask?

Well, I moved. Again. Only this time it was just down the street and around the corner. That was nice. But we did have to commute to the airport to the storage unit to get all our crap. That wasn't nice. I have to admit, I was a little scared to see the storage unit full of my life, but it wasn't as bad as I thought. Although now it looks much better only half full. Or half empty, if you're a pessimist like I am.

What else have I been doing? I started a business. The Back Porch Salon, LLC. I'm the owner/manager/stylist/receptionist. It's awesome so far. I have the best clients, and I always come home in a good mood. All signs of good things to come, I think.

You want more excuses for my absence? I went a week and a half without internet or TV. It was like having a limb removed. A very time consuming, narcissistic, lazy limb. But still, it was tough. Granted I could check my email and Facebook from my phone, but that was it. No blogs, no bejeweled, no GChat with Meg. It was hard.

So I took to watching borrowed movies from the library. Love Boat season 2 and Will and Grace season 6 and 7 kept me entertained. The Love Boat is awesome.

The fashions are so cool, and most of the girls outfits could be easily worn today and be very fashion forward.

Maybe not the banana hammocks the boys were sporting in the 70's, but those are never really cool. Unless you're my brother. He could rock pretty much anything.

Is that gross that I just talked about my brother in a banana hammock? Yeah, I think so too. Eew.

So now I have internet and TV and patio furniture and friends and a fire pit, and all is right with the world again.

Expect a triumphant return to my blog. Or at least something funny. Okay, maybe not funny, more like boring, or exasperating or downright foul. You know, typical me stuff.

Working Girl

I have 2 jobs now. Well, 3 if you count being a wife and mother and superhero. Wait, that's like, um, 5? I don't know, I don't do math. But I write for Examiner.com, as you all know, and in addition to all those other things, I have a job that actually pays me money! I know, it's this new fangled idear. I mean I guess one of us parents should be working, right?

So I'm officially a salon owner. It's called The Back Porch ( blog, prices, and before and after pictures coming soon), and it's a cute little salon in Riverton. I do it all. Cuts, colors of all kinds, waxing, and even a perm (if you're stuck in 1990, in which case I'll probably talk you into some other hair style because those kinds of perms are just nasty), if you're lucky.

So feel free to email me at thebackporchsalon@gmail.com, or my usual email, keli.clayton@gmail.com, and we'll set you up for a day o' beauty.

Privileged

We have moved. Again. This is the third time in five months. You'd think we'd be pros at this. We're not.

Although quite a bit of stuff that I never though would have survived the trip actually did, and some stuff I didn't even worry about surviving didn't. Go figure. Lamp shade, worried, but it made it. Solid wood and soapstone coffee table, not worried, scratched to Hell. Nice.

I've also decided you can tell at what point in our marriage furnishings were purchased. We have the RC Willey phase, then the Ikea phase, and finally, the nice, solid wood boutique pieces. It's like a financial time line.

So now we're living in my Mom's house. But, you know, without the Mom. Although, I'm fairly sure she's back to haunt me. And I'm thrilled! You see, I told her before she died that she better come back to visit. She promised she would. She hasn't, until Sunday night. We were dead (ha ha) asleep, in her old room, mind you, when we're startled awake by a loud thud. Something had fallen onto the wood floor in the hallway. I thought maybe it was a kid. Sean went out to investigate, and found a piece of moulding had fallen from the ceiling. It had been held in place with 4, count 'em, 4 nails. It was totally mom.

Some people might think it's weird that I'm sleeping in the room she lived and died in. I did at first too. But now, after being there to clean up and paint, I feel privileged to be there. I know she wouldn't want the house to be empty, and I know she needs the love of a family there. I feel like I can feel her hugging me as I lay there quietly in her room. It's the best part of having a heavenly mom.

Fun For Friday

This is the same hydrant that was dressed up last week. I don't know the story behind why it's suddenly naked, but I'm assuming the City has something to do with it.



At least they properly identified dear JAWA with a gorgeous headstone.

Happy Friday!